Why Use Lubricants?

Enjoyment – everyone who has sex can enhance the experience with the wide range of lubricants available and even those who don’t have sex can still improve their enjoyment during masturbation. Have fun with lubricants – they are a great sex toy!

Foreplay – lubes are great for extended foreplay. Any hand can feel rough when they first start to stimulate their partner. By warming a little lube in your hands your attentions will be far more welcomed. They will also love having their genitals teased with lube-moistened hands and manual stimulation will take on a whole new feeling.

Sexual health – Using a lube with a condom reduces the risk of condoms breaking as there is less friction. In this way, lube has an important part to play in promoting safer sex.

There are times when a women’s natural lubrication is lower than usual. This can be due to regular hormonal fluctuations that are just part of the monthly cycle, after childbirth, during and after menopause or even as a result of stress and tiredness. At these times a lube is a simple yet very effective way to ensure a positive and healthy sex life. Without lubrication sex can be painful which can reduce desire.

If you enjoy anal activity then it is vital you lubricate, lubricate, lubricate. Otherwise tiny tears can occur which in turn can harbour infection.

Slide effects (Reprinted by permission from MENS CONFIDENTIAL September 1995)

Knowing when and how to use personal lubricants could revolutionize your sex life.

Something's changed. You're not sure what, but sex just isn't what it used to be. Maybe your partner seems distant and uninterested, maybe her remoteness just comes and goes, or maybe it's you who just can't seem to get things going. Although it may seem as though the relationship is on the rocks, you may have just literally hit dry ground.

"A common cause for both men and women to lose interest in sex is a simple lack of lubrication," says Bruce Bekkar, M.D. an obstetrician and gynecologist practicing with the Southern California Kaiser Permanente Group in San Diego. Think of two pieces of sandpaper rubbing against each other and you'll start to get an idea of how unsatisfying "dry" intercourse be. It's none too healthy, either: Rubbing sensitive skin on the penis or lining the vagina too vigorously can cause abrasions and infections.

Since arousal is the primary stimulant for lubrication, dry sex can set in motion a destructive cycle. "Less lubrication creates less pleasurable sexual sensations. The diminishment in pleasure then leads to less arousal, which in turn creates lower levels of lubrication," explains Dr. Bekkar.

And that downward lack-of-slide can have a big effect on the performance of the penis. When men have anything less than a rock-hard erection, lack of lubrication may make the situation worse by making intercourse more difficult. "If a man's attempting penetration and not succeeding, he can get so frustrated and disappointed that he loses the erection altogether," says Laurence Levine, M.D., director of Male Sexual Function and Fertility Program at Rush-Presbyterian-St. Luke's Medical Center in Chicago.

All of these side effects can take a real toll on your relationship. When a man starts to notice that his wife seems remote and sexually uninterested, he may start to wonder if she's having an affair or if he's simply not able to satisfy her anymore. "It's very threatening to men when they're used to having their partners respond in a certain way and suddenly, or gradually, she just seems to lose interest," says Dr. Bekkar.

Think back on a recent sexual encounter. Did you feel a lot of friction, or have trouble with the initial penetration, or did things seem to slide together without much trouble? If you had several orgasms, did the later ones seem to generate more friction? Does the friction tend to increase the longer you keep going? Does your partner need more time before penetration than she used to? Do the lubrication levels seem to vary at different times of the month? If the answer to any of these questions is "yes," your sex life may be in the need of a little lube fine-tuning.

CYCLES OF LIFE
First, it's important to understand that men don't make much of a contribution in the slippery realm of sexual lubrication. While some men produce a bit of lubrication from the tiny glands that line the urethra (the tube that carries semen and urine through the penis), most release nothing more than a little early seminal fluid. "Lubrication falls almost entirely to the woman: Men don't really contribute in a noticeable way," says Dr. Levine.

It's critical then to throw off our studied ignorance of all things related to the female cycle: By understanding when lubrication might not be available, no matter how aroused your partner is, you can learn when it might be critical to have a little lube tube handy.

MENSTRUAL CYCLE
If your partner seems very lubricated at some times and fairly dry at others, it may be simply due to her monthly cycle. Women in their childbearing years ride a veritable hormonal roller coaster, undergoing shifts in the quantity and quality of lubrication at different points of their cycle.

About two weeks after menstruation, certain hormones peak and the egg is released. It's during this time of the month, ovulation, that the opening to the uterus, the cervix, begins to release a watery mucus that forms a slick highway to facilitate the sperm's journey to the egg. "This increase in cervical mucus adds to a feeling of vaginal 'wetness," says Margaret Polaneczky, M.D., assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at New York Hospital-Cornell Medical Center in New York. Some women also report heightened desire at this point in their cycle.

POSTPARTUM
After the birth of a child, a woman's estrogen levels dive, and they stay fairly low as long as she's breast-feeding. "When estrogen levels are low for a long prolonged period of time, the vaginal tissues just don't lubricate very well," explains Dr. Bekkar.

MENOPAUSE
Right around the age of 50, most women will undergo dramatic hormonal shifts that signal an end to their reproductive years-and a dramatic drop in their levels of lubrication. "Within a few months to a year after menopause occurs, a woman will notice a significant decrease in her amount of lubrication and the elasticity of her vaginal tissues," says Dr. Bekkar. Both of these effects are brought about by a reduction in the level of estrogen-and can often be reversed in the long term by taking estrogen supplements.

SLIP SLIDING AWAY
So now that you know when and why you need a lubricant, the best thing to do is run out to your local drugstore and pick up whatever they've got-right? Not exactly. "Widely available lubricants, like K-Y jelly, were originally designed for medical use and aren't designed to stay slick as long as some of the products especially designed for sex," says Cathy Winks of Good Vibrations, an adult mail-order company based in San Francisco. In other words, you may want to buy your lubricant from a sex specialty store.

When it comes to selecting a particular lubricant, keep in mind your intended usage. If you're going to pair the lube with a condom, be sure to stick with water-based formulation: The oils in some brands can eat away at latex. If you'll be using lubricants in conjunction with oral sex, read the labels carefully: Glycerin and sucrose carry a sweet taste, and detergents such as nonoxynol-9, methylparaben and propylparaben are likely to impart a soapy, medicinal flavor. Some people have reported a slight numbing of the tongue with lubricants containing nonoxynol-9. "However it's perfectly safe to use," assures Dr. Polaneczky.

The rules for using lubricants are simple: A little dab, lightly rubbed on the clitoris, penis or just inside the vagina, will do ya'.

If you or your partner notice a problem with painful intercourse as a result of dryness, our experts recommend that you get a physician to rule out any more serious problems such as a yeast infection or a sexually transmitted disease.

CHOOSING THE RIGHT LUBE
Although lubricants hold the promise of dramatically increasing sexual sensation and performance, they're only as good as they taste and feel. So we at MEN'S CONFIDENTIAL decided to do some, er, hands-on field research and test a few of the more popular brands for ourselves. (Hey, it's a tough job, but someone's got to do it.) We put seven different lubricants through their paces in a variety of situations (intercourse, masturbation and oral sex), and rated them on the basis of the following factors:

Taste. ID, Aqua Lube and Astroglide emerged as the clear Winners in this category, while ForPlay and Wet completely struck out. The flavored lubes, Motion lotion-Raspberry and Wet-N-Redi-Peach worked best with manual stimulation or masturbation. In addition to their flavor, they were also warm to the touch and heated up for a moment when blown upon.

Consistency. Motion lotion, K-Y Jelly, Wet-N-Redi and Forplay proved to be the thickest lubes. They had a tendency to gum up and get tacky rather quickly, in addition to leaving a sticky residue on hands and sheets. AquaLube or Slip had a smooth texture that made penetration very easy, worked well with manual stimulation and cleaned up easily.

Reactivation. We'd heard that a spritz of water could revive a dried-out lubricant, so we gave them all a try. K-Y Jelly and Astroglide did in fact spring back to life, but spritzing didn't do a thing for ForPlay. The consensus was that having the water bottle there was definitely more convenient than fumbling for the tube to add more lubricant-and a whole lot more playful.

Longevity. Only two that we tried didn't require more lube or water to finish the job: ID and Wet. ForPlay emerged as the big loser: After failing to reactivate it with water, we tried to add more, but it just wouldn't take. We were too frustrated to go on.

Quantity. There's something decidedly unsexy about having to use a big glob of these slippery creatures. ID, Wet and Slip all worked well with just a little dab.

Overall, we liked ID best. The overwhelming sentiment, however, was that all lubricants really did heighten sexual pleasure. Although prior to this test none of us had incorporated lubricants into lovemaking, we came to the consensus that extra lubrication did indeed seem to make each sensation more deep and intense.